World AIDS Day The Good and The Bad and Ugly

December 1st is "World AIDS Day" it is a day I stop and think of who of my friends are gone because of it.  I have attended public vigils in the past and look around the room and counted the number of people there and realized there are not enough hands in this room that can be used to count the number of people I know or whom I have cross paths with that have died of AIDS.

I attended a vigil once in Toronto behind the 519 Community Center Cawthra Park during Gay Pride Week, they continue the practice of preventing TV Cameras from attending the event to record what was happening during the event which I am glad as people could let their emotions out and truly cry.  In attendance, there were parents, brothers, sisters, friends, those who work in the field.  There was not a dry eye in the house, everyone holding a candle in memory as the names were read out loud of those who had past and been added to the wall in the garden surrounding the center.  Every time I am there I try to make a trip to the wall which runs through the park to pay respect to those I know who have moved on, who have fought the good fight given it all, even volunteering like me until their last breath.  They are all listed by years and as each year is posted you see the list is getting shorter and shorter as people like me are living longer after 1996 International AIDS Conference in Vancouver which I got to attend breakthroughs started to be made and people started to live longer strive for better life and do the right thing hence the theme that year "One World One Hope".

I can remember the day, date and location and who I was with the person who gave me the virus.  He has left this earth but I am still here I am a fighter after what will be 34 years on December 10th with this virus it is starting to wear me down a bit.  But I continue to fight and strive for what I think is right and do the right thing as I see it.  My former partner is a rock and strength although he still drives me up the wall also my BFF in Second Life.  You all keep me going strong and alive, you make me want to do more for those who live with it and newly diagnosed in RL and tactics for prevention of stopping people from getting this virus.  I still want to understand why the largest segment of the population in RL getting this are those 18 - 24 both those who are gay and straight, I love to find the answer to this and why they do not head to the message.

The new thing is Bug Chasers looking for Gift Givers.  Yes there are people out there looking to catch this another question I love to have an answer to.  They think they will have benefits get more money and let me tell you you will get less.  I encourage friends who are not to go on PrEP. PrEP means Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis, and it’s the use of anti-HIV medications to keep HIV negative people from becoming infected.  There is also a medication in this group of drugs that I take and has put me into the spot where I am Un-ifectious and the virus is Un-detecable (U=U).  Meaning I cannot spread the virus to anyone through sexual contact.  There are people out there who refuse to get tested and end up infecting others unknowing because they do not know, if you are active get tested both men and women not just for HIV but HPV men pass on to women HPV.  I just want to see everyone do the right thing in the right way for the right reason and not try to fool anyone or rip them off of financial resources.

Discrimination is great in RL and SL mostly based on fear and stigma of those living with HIV like myself, some people have stop talking to me in SL because I have HIV or will have pixel sex because I have HIV in RL.  It is that fear and stigma that make things worse for people like me because we won't give in to your point of view.  Some are upset the laws have changed in some states and countries regarding HIV as it is not a terminal illness so it is no longer considered manslaughter.  

On December 1st "World Aids Day" I will donate all the tips I earn to a charity as I do every year.  This year the amount of money I turn over will include T-Shirts that are available made for me by Dany Vale of Red Angel Designs.  My Charity this year is the "AIDS Memorial Quilt" in Canada and the U.S.A..

Two samples are to the left Top one is from the Canadian Quilt quilt made up of 8 panels. The NAMES Project AIDS Memorial Quilt, often abbreviated to AIDS Memorial Quilt, is an enormous quilt made as a memorial to celebrate the lives of people who have died of AIDS-related causes both doses separately in Canada and the U.S.A.

The quilt has grown in size it is estimated that in the U.S.A. it weighs 54 tons and is stored in Atlanta in Canada it is stored in Ottawa.  It cost money to keep the storage facility running and          keep them in pristine condition for future viewing.

If your not going to be around December 1st and you want to support this effort you can do so in advance.  There are donation Jars and T-Shirt Vendors location around the grid at:  K.O.X.X. MALL  , Gay Fun World, Treason and at Red Angel Designs at this time (Landmarks Below).  I will be report every few days of an increase on a donation on my facebook page which has in a few short days reached $924L.  The T-Shirts are also for sale on Marketplace https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/91041

I am planning numerous sets that day around the grid which will include K.O.X.X. MALL (Special Venue), Gay Mens Cove, Gay Fun Beach and there is a fourth venue yet to be named yes 4 sets of two hours each to raise more than just lindens.  My objective as a long term survivor is to raise awareness and support for those living with HIV/AIDS in SL and RL.  We need to hear it from others whom we are close to, we need to know you accept us for who we are and what we live with without worry or concern that you are avoiding us because of it.

I ask each of you to come out on December 1st and help me raised the needed resources for charity by timing me and whom I am working with for a just cause and just reason.  I will start the "Around The Grid Tour"  November 30th please come and support with your dancing talents and donations.  I want to thank also Markarius Viper, Evan Greymyst, Rayden, Fusion, Reyn, Andre and my SL Family for their ongoing support.


LINKS below where you can buy T-Shirt $149L each or both for $260L there is also a female version of the shirt.  You can also donate at the same locations watch for the poster of the parties.

K.O.X.X. MALL

Gay Fun World - Gaylaria

Treason - Gay Slave and Human Trafficking

RedAngel Designs - By Danny Vale

Depression

Many people in SL deal with Depression in RL each and every day of their life from the time they wake up till when they go to bed.  You just can't shake it no matter what once there for most people it is there for the rest of your life.

I am one of them, I put on a brave face, love to laugh, have many good friends including my BFF Markarius and my clan family.  Some people do not like me because I stand my ground on things they disagree with the action or the way I go about getting it done but when you can raise $165 RL Cash in four hours with the help of those close to me, I have proved them wrong.

My thrill in life is to do charity work and raise money for those who are even less fortunate than me, and I am literally poor.  I live on $616 CDN a month which works out to $437 USD.  I have lived with HIV for 33 years soon 34 never been sick because of the virus, but can easily get the flu.

My HIV status is "Undetectable" which means I cannot spread it through sexual contact, but the stigmatization and fear of other in RL and SL keep them away from me.  Damm your not going to get a thing from me more so in SL.  My RL family except for my brother knows of my health and when I get to hug and cuddle my great nephew cause I love this autistic boy I feel good.  Laws are being decriminalized because of this not just in California but all over North America and even the UK is looking at this but the Center For Disease Control in the USA has admitted this is true "  cdc-officially-admits-people-positive-undetectable-cannot-transmit-hiv
".
So remember the words you can say to someone in SL hurt there is a real person on the other side of the screen that is real that has feelings and is doing what they can to survive in SL like me.  Anything you do or say could affect them and what they are dealing with in the worst way.  Some dont care I know that and they never will they see this as a gay s chance to do a "Mental Mind Fuck (MMF)" on someone because they see this as just a game but it is more than a game, real lives and real people are involved.  I am sure they would be upset if someone turn around on them and maybe then they can realize how things are.  SL is my escape from RL and I love to DJ,

I am not here to create a "MMF" I am not here to take bull from others who try to prove to other they are right and make me look bad, call me names and try to do everything they can to make me look bad when in the end they have done something that makes them look bad and puts them in a place where they cannot be trusted.

I love my family in SL and Friends and some of them do not get along but I keep that separate I understand why however it does not change the way I feel about them.  There are those whom are on the fence as they have not done anything wrong but have gotten me to see who they are and it is them I keep a close eye on, because I am not sure what they think.

Moving on, I hope

The last few months have brought me some grief with the RL passing of two people near and dear to me DanR and Nibz.  These two were a good couple for each other in Second Life and made many friends and a couple children Nemo and Fabian.

Nibz was separated from his RL Family and they were not involved with anything so the obit was short and sweet walter-bunyan-obituary.  I have had bearly my own time to grieve and consider this matter given that I been trying to fulfill Nibz wishes him and I spoke about after Dan's service with the request that I not leave him alone.

Nibz has been a part of my life in SL from about the time he was 8 months in and he came to me looking for a job at my bar.  I will be forever gratefull for what he has done for me, with me and used my advice and opinion in a way that things came out better for him.

He went peacefully in his sleep and now him and Dan are on the other side of the rainbow having fun.

As I said on Facebook: "This situation saddens us all after the recent passing of his SL husband in RL Ðαɳ Ʀαγmαkȼɾ-ℳiɾαbȼllα (danr.raymaker). We are all bothered by this and we are dealing with it as best we can.

A service of remembrance will be held Sunday September 10th (Grandparents Day) 2PM at the same location of Dan's service and a fund raiser party will follow to send a donation to S.P.C.A. to honor Nibz and Dan's love for their pets. To date including funds from Dan's event the funds total $35,355L we like to raise a bit more.

Service Time: 2PM (Doors Open at 1PM)
Location: Viper Gulch, Wanda 

You can pick up more information on the service at the memorial location in SL at  

http://maps.secondlife.com/…/Forbidden%20Pleasur…/30/93/3502

Look for the picture posted here to get the info:

Contest Theme "Payment Info on File"

I like to see some place or a few places to se t"Payment Info on File"as the theme people can come as they are but can only enter the contest if they have payment info on file.  I wonder if anyone would anyone give it a try before the alts of alts start crying not fair when all they do is just stand around enter a contest and leave when all is over and go on to the next one, without giving a tip to any of the staff.

This was just a thought that I thought I would put out there, I doubt it would happen but may get rid of some of the alts at some parties.

Test, Test and more Test

I am dealing with some RL medical issues this weekend will start it with a MRI on Sunday and seeing a specialist on Wednesday, not near my home so I will be away from the computer with my DJ Equipment on it and music.

I will try to be in world when possible but will not be able to spin as normal, it was my hope to participate in the GFW Anniversary but the slot I had was on Sunday and I could not be in an MRI Machine and DJ at the same time.

I will be back to Gay Mens Cove on Wednesday August 23rd.

See you all on the flip side

Second Pride Elections and Where I am at......

Some of my friends have asked me recently to consider offering for Chair of "Second Pride" board of directors during and after the event ending in early July.  I have reached a decision regarding this after much thought and soul searching regarding the request made of me by people I know and trust.

My decision at this point is not to offer at this time is for various reasons of which I will explain here.  I came to this decision without being told by others not to run or to offer but because I have to put RL first.  I will also say because of my RL training and involvement in not-for-profit organization I would be willing to do treasurer but because of RL health, I may not always be available for meetings.

I am dealing with various medical issues in RL that sometimes require significant rest to deal with my issues.  If you see me in SL and do not get a response chances are I am in another room resting trying to relax.

I will be having various surgeries in RL soon that will require extended time and rest along with time away from Second Life in order to help resolve the issues.  The most major of the surgeries is on my back.  I have been told it will be a 4 to 6 week recovery period.  Another will require a week away from things but 6 weeks of recovery.  These operations are just a couple of the major thing and could happen anytime during the next year.

I have applied in RL for full disability from the Federal Government in Canada by submitting a 25 page document with the reason why they should grant me my appeal that document alone because of the pain I am dealing with took me 48 days to complete but I got it done.  In it I highlighted the previous appeal and process they put me through was not clear nor was it transparent as no one communicated with me and they made their choice based on information they already had and had not waited until they got the other documents I told them I would be submitting.  I ask everyone for their good thoughts and wishes.

The current board of directors is up for election all the seat, the way the by laws are written not one of the current board can re-offer for election.  However, they can be appointed back to the board by those elected or offer for a position that the newly elected board makes a call for.

Some of the current members of the board have been there for a few years because no one has offered or people have resigned and the spots need to be filled.  These people over the years have put in time and energy to make this work so the LGBTQ-two spirited communities in second life can celebrate and show their pride.  There are people in SL who can for one reason or another do that.

I encourage you all to who have the strength to consider offering and filling one of the vacant seats

Being Chair is not an easy job I am sure Ledge can tell you that, I have experienced it and some of my skills were put to the test.  I look forward to a successful pride in 2018 and this time there could be new people looking after things and happenings.  I was glad to DJ 3 times at pride this year and kicking off "Canada Day" was an honor.  It was great to see it recognized during pride.

Below is a posting on the second pride website and in world group I ask you to sign up and participate, this is your community, not just mine.

Candidate statements are being taken online August 7th through Midnight August 19th. Submit a brief statement declaring your interest in the position, the skills you will bring to the job and why you want to be elected.  All Candidate statements should be submitted at https://second-pride.com/ using the https://second-pride.com/candidate-submission-form/

For further details about elections, board postions and candidate statements please go to our website 

K.O.X.X. end of another era

Today a part of my life and history came to end it was funny for me that "Kronborg: A Northern Paradise (RLV and Gay)" also was a planned closing today a sim I went to a few times to explore but never got to truly see.

It is the time that I move on, and away from what I was doing and wait for the flood of new clubs to pass.  I don't think at this time I will ever return to the business again and stick with just DJing.  I was happy to have a few close friends show up today and many been there to support me in one form or another.

I will continue on doing what I love doing in SL DJ and giving it my all.  Yes I have plans for events to happen as I normally do every year.  I want to thank all who showed up today tip me and BamBam also for your kind words and encouragement.  I will start stripping the parcel on Friday and get ready to move on to new beginnings.

I will address and respond to the request I have gotten over the last few days about offering for Second Pride Chair.

Thanks to NakedCarl Panner for blogging the event with pictures:  http://www.nakedcarl.com/?zx=4dd002a8bba23750



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Ever evolving and changing

Things seem to be evolving and changing in Second Life with the public opening of Sansar.  Also it seems the crowd and people are way down after Second Pride happened.  Bar and sim are closing because of lack of attendance at parties and events and people are trying to revamp themselves by closing one bar one day and opening a new bar the next it is just not going to work.

Big contest take away from everyone and I am sure if you check everyone there you will find many of the avatars have no payment info on file and are most likely just standing there not moving but yet are in on the contest or have the club tag for the free lindens.

Over the last few week's there have been numerous new bars and locations open for people to attend and enjoy.  There are more on the way 3 that I know of including a new venue for a well-known location in addition to the current venues they already have.  Two of these new venues yet to open will be operated by close friends involved.  Some of the other places are operated by people I have come to know.

Recently some events at established venues have had 6 people to 10 unless there is a contest involved. Some say because of the season but even though that maybe part of the reason for low attendance,  it is more than that.  There are just too many venues to support the grid and the amount of events happening now at the time slot I counted 6 one day even with all the AVI's in Second Life.

I am not in Second Life as a DJ to make money with K.O.X.X. I will be happy to break even and cover expenses which total about $5000L  a week and this does include tier and my stream.  Over the last two weeks I have made about 1/2 that amount just not enough for me to continue with my own place.  I am indebted and have a great love for my friends and those who have supported me such as BamBam for all he has done in the design and layout of the parcel (K.O.X.X.} along with Rayden, Markarius, Daniel Vale, Fusion, Kaiden, Noxy, NakedCarl, Edwin, Jimmy, Danyel there are many, many more.  I am sorry if I missed someone but I am dealing with RL Pain and health Issues.

Because of the season along with other reasons, that I am not being able to meet expenses ($7000L in four weeks when I need $20K) I will have events at K.O.X.X. the last one being "Thursday August 10th at 1PM".  I did not open this venue to compete with others I open it to have fun and it is just not happening at this time.  I will continue to DJ where I am currently and when I can depending on medical appointments and issues.  Otherwise, I am not making any commitment except for fundraising events planned or being work on.

I also will have back surgery in the near future and the recovery time is 4-6 weeks I maybe able to be in world but cannot manage or be stressed out during the recovery period.  I hope you all understand and join me during one last event to close out and maybe with hope for the future.

Thank You again for your support and I will see you on the flip side.

Ezzie (not pronounced easy)

I thought it was about time i get back into blogging it has been a while.  I am looking at doing more things actively here and offering my opinion and saying how I see things as they are in Second Life.  Some May not agree and those with negative comments will have them removed if they are out of line and not right for as with most bloggers.